Years ago, when the first Jurassic Park film came out (Steven Spielberg, 1973) my sister pointed out that they set up the microscope wrong and that it wouldn’t work the way they had it. (Apparently, the film was too cheap to have a science expert on set to ensure it was put together properly. They only had over 60 million dollars, but facts and precision…eh who needs em? LA LA LA)

Recently, I made a film called Detention 101 (which I promise to release soon) and I picked a lot of stereotypical “canned ad” music (as I like to call it) to drive home the points I was trying to make with the project. This got me thinking about music in films and how it isn’t just there to support the action. It can add to the story, build humor, enhance characters, make a point, set the scene, add to the dialogue or sadly be the best part of a film. (Read as: The film bombed, but the soundtrack made millions.)

The only thing that holds me back from making films all the time is money. I write, I direct, I edit, I can even produce and if it came down to it shoot my own work, but the one thing that stops me is money. Filmmaking is expensive and though it’s never been cheaper to make a film, to make a film well does still cost a decent amount of money, even on an indie film level.

You might think artists are insane and I don’t blame you. We are constantly trying to do something that’s really hard and the payoff often is just the satisfaction of having done it. We are not getting wealthy. We are likely getting poorer actually and we are certainly not getting famous. We are making art for art’s sake.

I had COVID last week. Being trapped at home alone with just your dog and the bad news on the internet really got me down. All I could see were politicians failing us, violence and sickness everywhere, economic crisis and oh yeah, the planet? Dying right before our eyes.

Many years ago, someone called me provocative for the first time. I remember instinctually looking down at myself to check to see if I had forgotten to get dressed that day. In my head, provocative meant naked.

You know, there are some days where everything just goes wrong. I mean everything.

I have to confess that I love to eat while watching movies and television at home.

Today, I am pondering, among other things (including why no one has invented one of those Star Trek thingys that make food appear with the click of a few buttons) how I ended up as a filmmaker.

I know, brash title for my post here but really, WTF is with Hollywood? That’s a wide comment I know, there is so much “wrong” happening on any given day, it is hard to keep a full running list.

Back in 2014, I was hired to direct and edit a feature film called Sugar! Sugar! is a film about a 50-year old housewife who decides to follow her dreams of being in a rock band while her husband tries to get elected to a political office for the first time. The film is really about how women are often thought of as “done” once they hit “a certain age” and how that mindset holds so many people back.

Okay, so I’m going to quote some conversations I’ve had with people who are not indie filmmakers or artists of any kind. These conversations often relate hilarious misconceptions of what it’s like to be an artist. And I don’t blame these people, it just makes me laugh. I’m laughing near them, not at them.

It’s mid-year and as usual I find myself thinking, “I’m behind.” and “I should have shot another film already.” and “I need more M&Ms. There are never enough M&Ms…”

I often comment on how hard it is to make an indie film and therefore how important it is that one makes it count. To make a film count means to say something that leads to change.

I was always an active kid, constantly dancing and moving around. If someone had looked into the future and told my ten-year-old self that as an adult, I would spend much of my life sitting in front a computer editing, I would have asked for a second opinion or possibly run away screaming.

Every once in a while, I stop and look back to where I started and where I am at present. I highly advise doing this especially on days that you feel like your artistic career is going nowhere. You will always be amazed realizing how far you have come. Day to day, it often doesn’t seem like much, but then one day you look back and think “wow, look at me!”.

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who wanted to learn how to draw. She had $7 for crayons and paper but she sure what she should draw. So, she sought out experts in her neighborhood. The man who lived down the street who never draw anything in his life, but visited many museums said, “Well, you have to create something colorful because that will get people’s attention. Use as many colors as you can.” And then he charged her $2 for the advice.

I was listening to David Bowie’s “Changes” and that got me thinking about the need for change in many parts of society including the film industry. You may or may not know this, but when studios first began, they certainly made “entertaining films” but they also prided themselves on making art films (pushing film technique) and also films about important topics.

I have something to confess. I have…a…day job. That’s right! I have a J-O-B and I have had it for years. In fact, it’s turned into a full-fledged career.