Mid-year Crisis

It’s mid-year and as usual I find myself thinking, “I’m behind.” and “I should have shot another film already.” and “I need more M&Ms. There are never enough M&Ms…”

I don’t think I’m the only one who faces this mid-year crisis, and so I thought I’d share how I deal with it. Before I get to my three question process, let’s take a deeper look into Dorothy’s journey to Oz.

So there is this poor farm girl and she somehow ends up very far from home with no way of getting back and so she sets out to find someone who can help her make this happen. (She is in essence a representative of a poor indie filmmaker with no funds and no connections and no clear path to getting her film made.) So this poor farm girl / indie filmmaker, puts on some very fancy shoes and starts walking down a yellow brick road eager to find the best path to her goal. (She has branded herself with glitter shoes to make herself stand out. She feels they represent her happy, shiny outlook on her crappy, failed life.) Along the way, she meets others like herself that have goals that appear to be beyond their own abilities and pocketbooks. (aka, other indie filmmakers and actors). And as they go on their way, encountering poisonous poppies, (The life sucking pay to play workshops / meet an agent or casting director where everything looks pretty in the room but in the end you are exhausted from the stress it caused you. And you are left wondering where it got you and usually it’s nowhere but lying on your couch debating if the money would have been better spent on Chinese food and ice cream.) flying monkeys, (Talent agents who take you onboard, make you feel oh so talented and then drop you in a terrible equity showcase because “Baby, this will make your career and oh yeah, I owe somebody a favor. So the show is in a big, dank castle? You’ll have something to talk about on talk shows…some day…”) the biggest shyster Oz (aka, executive producer), and of course, The Wicked Witch of the West (That reviewer who does not get indie film at all and but somehow wields all that power over it.)

The thing is Dorothy and her friends do finally make it to Oz and they discover that what they wanted to achieve was all within themselves after all. They didn’t need that shyster or that reviewer or those money sucking pay to play events. They could do all the things they want to do with what they have inside themselves.

The end.

Okay, nice allegory Shari but what are your steps for getting myself out of this “I think I will stare at a blank wall thinking about how I’m failing every day” state I am in. I hear you. So here is what I do:

One, I stop and think, “Well, what have you done so far this year, Shari?”

My current answer (as an example for you): This year, I’ve started a blog/vlog/podcast thingy (Yes, this is what I call it.) and I’ve jumped into social media to promote it.

Two, I ponder, “How much work and time did that take, Shari?”

My current answer: “Well, that took a lot of work and time. I’m exhausted just thinking about it."

Three, I ask myself, “What do you plan to do with the second half of the year, Shari?”

My current answer: “Well, I’m continuing with the blog/vlog/podcast thingy which is going much smoother now that I’ve got a handle on it, I’ll also be releasing my most recent film DETENTION 101 online and I’m going to start my next film.”

Then I sit back and eat some M&Ms. And realize it’s not so bad. Sadly, the shyster has not appeared with funds for my next film but hey I’ve avoided the poppies, the monkeys and The Wicked Witch of the West so far this year.

By the way, I’m opting to look to indie film critics who understand what that word (indie) means to review my work. (Check out One Film Fan to see what I mean.)

The moral of this is (a) don’t panic and (b) it may not feel like you are doing much sometimes because you are not where you want to be at this point in your life or you haven’t raised those funds you wanted or you haven’t been cast in a big movie…the list goes on, but when you stop and think of where you were six months ago and where you are right now, it’s a good reminder that this is one big freakin’ journey, it never ends but you are continuing forward. And I hope you have some M&Ms to celebrate with. No, they are not my sponsor. If they were, I would have my funds wouldn’t I? :-)