Skate Your Way to Happiness
I’ve been watching the 2022 Olympic figure skating competitions. It’s quite amazing to view. These athletes go out there, give it all they can, and are so happy when they do their best. Whether they come in 20th or 1st, if they surpassed their previous high scores for the season, they are thrilled. They are jumping up and down, clapping, smiling.
This made me think about competition and comparison. So, a competition is designed to have a winner and a couple of runner ups. This means that there is a constant comparison going on between these athletes. Yet, one figure skater after another coming in 20th or 7th or 1st, all appear genuinely thrilled. That seems contradictory.
Obviously, each one is on her own journey, comparing her results to the scores she received in the past, throughout this season and throughout their time in the sport. Okay, that makes sense and sounds like a perfectly healthy attitude. Except it’s not quite right. These skaters also have goals and expectations that have to do with placements and placements have to do with comparison.
You might hear one athlete stating, “My goal is to come in the top ten.” and another athlete stating, “My goal is to win a medal.” and yet another stating, “I aim to make it to the finals and get to skate in both sections of the competition.”
Hmmm…so if they are not comparing themselves to others, it sounds like some of these people don’t want to win. I don’t believe that. I’m sure the person who comes in 24th and just manages to get into the free skate, happy as can be, would love to win a medal. What really is happening is that the athlete has compared herself to the other athletes and she knows the probability of what can and cannot happen for her. She knows, it would be a great achievement if she could just do her best and qualify for the second half of the competition. Another skater knows, “I have great skill, but there are six people who can do things I cannot do so I’m good with getting into the top ten.”
By comparing oneself to others in a logical manner, one can set expectations and continue happily on one’s personal journey. Then, when a person comes in ninth place, she can celebrate instead of being disappointed. Think about it, if an athlete comes in ninth, that means she is NINTH IN THE WORLD. That is a great achievement. No, she is not getting a shiny, heavy object to hang around her neck. Still, there is much to enjoy and be grateful for and know that the hard work paid off. It would be terrible if she was sitting there thinking, “I stink. I didn’t get a medal.” when she never had a chance to do that in the first place.
You cannot enjoy your journey if you have unrealistic goals.
This is true for filmmakers, actors and anyone trying to do something artistic through hard work and dedication. If you make a feature film on a five-figure budget with no funds for marketing, it is unrealistic to believe that you will be able to compete with films made on a seven-figure budget with an equal amount for marketing plus star power.
You will only be met with disappointment.
Imagine these scenarios:
Let’s suppose your film has a five-figure budget. You come up with ten festivals that are interested in your style of filmmaking and accept films that have micro budgets like yours. You then set a goal to get into at least two of those. And, let’s say, you get into three. This means you exceeded your expectations and have a smile on your face.
Now, let’s suppose your film has a five-figure budget. You apply to all the top festivals that all the multi-million-dollar films apply to. You get into zero of these. You have a big frown on your face. No one sees your film and you are crushed, not wanting to make another film…ever.
Which is better?
Yes, we are each on our own journey. And, as much as the film industry would like us to believe otherwise with awards being passed out based on market share, art is NOT a competition. Still, you must set your own expectations and remember, you are not doing this to “win”, you are doing this to create art and share it with the world just like the athlete who comes in last. Last, is a much better achievement than not at all.